Unreasonable Guilt

Well, now I feel guilty.

Backstory: I am moving to Milwaukee in about six weeks. I've started the apartment search, and am currently compiling a list of places to see. I don't live anywhere near Milwaukee, so I'm going to have to take off work next week and fly out there to see potential apartments and sign my lease. With that in mind, I'll be arranging the most streamlined schedule possible to see as many places as I can.

I've been using Craigslist as my primary source of potential apartments. I found my current landlord through Craigslist and he's been fantastic. But - I'm wary of places that don't show pictures of their rental properties. Generally, if I e-mail someone and ask for pictures they cough a few up.

So, I contacted another likely landlord and asked for some pictures. Which she refused to provide. I then told her that I'm under a pretty strict timeline, and I wouldn't be interested in seeing her property without advance photos. Thanks, but no thanks.

Three hours later, I have not one, but two e-mails full of pictures. I didn't mean to make the poor lady rush over there and take these pictures - it was just a statement of fact. I'm leary of sketchy Craigslist listings with no photos.

So, sorry Milwaukee landlady! I'll come see you place, it looks very nice.

Holy Cow! A post!

Race Review: The Ikea Montour Trail Run.

So this morning, I sacrificed the only morning I could possibly sleep in on and headed out for the Ikea Half-marathon. You'd think that since I've been to the Ikea before, I wouldn't get lost. You would be wrong.

Luckily, I got unlost without having to try and wake up anyone to play GPS for me and without visiting Erie PA (it was a little iffy for a moment there - yay for illegal U-turns). I got there with plenty of time to spare though and even got to stand in the porta-potty line. I'll tell you...no matter how many times I go in advance, I always have to go if there's porta-potties. I can run for 2.5 hours at home and never stop...but does that matter before a race? Of course not. I actually saw a porta-potty get "discontinued" after some guy used it. I have to admit - I was impressed. The standards for porta-potties are pretty low, but I couldn't quite bring myself to look and see what he did to it. And I didn't want to be mistaken for the lowest of the low...the porta-potty line cutter.

Anyway, enough about the porta potties. The race started in the Ikea parking lot and went downhill for about a half mile before we hit the Montour trail. This was not as fun as it sounded...the grade was pretty steep and I never warm up. Even my shins were a little sore by the time we finished the hill. I also attribute my ridiculous 6:50 first mile to the hill. It had to be the hill...the alternative is that I'm an idiot. My second mile dropped down to 7:50, which is much more reasonable. I settled into a nice 8min/mile pace after that and just cruised along. The gradient leveled out after the first mile and I could tell if it was uphill or downhill. Coming back felt slightly downhill, but it was so slight as to be irrelevant.

The trail was very nice, if un-challenging. It was wide enough to serve and an out-and-back and still let people pass each other. The scenery was nice, with my favorite part being an covered railway tunnel, that was very cool. It was pretty long too. The weather was very good, if a little damp. It was kind enough to wait until I finished to start seriously thundering.

The race management was quite good. Some girl on the bus complained about the lack of cheering, but honestly...who comes to a trail race expecting cheering? People would have to hike up to seven miles each way to reach the back parts of the trail, and I think that's kind of silly. There was several water stops (about one every two miles), and mile markers at each mile. That's good enough for me. There was fruit at the race tent and some bread, although no bagels.

There was one element of the race that made me very, very happy. They didn't take us back up that damned hill. Brilliant! They had the turn-around at mile seven and just ended on a flat straightaway. I could have kissed someone when I saw the finish.

I did okay...1hours45min5seconds, which works out to 8:01 minutes a mile. I didn't place, but that's okay. I did walk away with 26 hair ties, for some reason. I guess they had an excess since some volunteer was walking around giving out handfuls of the things to anyone with long hair. So...I guess that's good. I usually just have one, but I suppose it never hurts to have 26 spares.

In other news, I decided yesterday that yes, Pediatrics is for me. Now that I've had the clerkship, I feel that I can honestly say this and mean it. Now, if only I didn't have to work tomorrow, everything would be peachy.

Here vs. There

I think I may have finally figured out why I don't like international traveling. I've known I don't like international travel for a while. For a long time, I never considered it, since it wasn't an option. Even now, it's not really an option since, hey, expensive, but there are far more opportunities in medical school then there were in college or earlier. But...I've never been tempted. Not at all. There's an opportunity to go to Honduras for one of the clinical rotations next year, but *click* that e-mail went right into the deleted folder.

But, I think I just figured it out. It's complicated and I'm not quite sure that it all makes sense. I can see part of the reason, but I haven't followed it all the way to its end yet. I might just be irrational. Part of it is that I don't like being a tourist. I find it intrusive and in a lot of ways, obnoxious. I hate tourist culture. I think that's why I loved the West so much. Yeah, there was touristy type stuff, but it wasn't in-your-face, people everywhere, pointing and buying terrible food and novelty t-shirts. Okay, well, maybe at Old Faithful in Yellowstone...but we had to go there...it was required.

The larger part has to do with culture though. I don't like invading other people's culture. I don't like the diluted version that would be available to someone like me. I want to learn something about my own culture, if I travel. I think going West did that. I think going North will do that again. Yes, there are many beautiful places to see in the world. But there are beautiful places here too, and I'd rather quietly contemplate them, than fuss with going overseas to some country where I'm a stranger. There's a benefit to learning about other cultures, but I'm not sure you can do it in a short trip. Maybe a 1+ years abroad, but I don't have that kind of time.

And now I'm really behind on my self-imposed endo studying schedule. Shoot. If I was brave, I'd discuss this with internationally oriented people here (*cough* A.) but I don't think it'd go over well.

Cars

So, my car has needed four services in the last four months. True, one was an annual checkup, but it still cost me $100. This is my cue to start looking at new cars. Now, I favor small hybrids (even if I could afford an Accord, I would still want a Civic) and small hatchbacks. The Honda Fit, Toyota Yaris, heck, maybe even the Scion xA hatchback. I like these cars and they're good for city driving.

But, then I was thinking - how long am I going to be in the city? I don't want to take on a car payment while I'm still accumulating debt, so my Volvo has to last another two years. Then I'll probably stay in an East-Coast city for my residency. That's three years, and maybe another two for my residency. Based on that, I can justified finding a gently used hybrid or hatchback.

It's the part after my training, when I'm actually looking for a job and to start a career, that things get sticky. I honestly think I'm going to end up out west - or possibly farther North. I'm considering trying for a rotation in Alaska now. And, I can really see myself settling there. I *miss* Montana. A lot. I think about it often and I want to go back. It's so beautiful and I think I'm well suited to living there. Except for the bitter cold, but hell, twenty-five+ years of training and I ought to be able to afford a decent winter coat. You know, something with down.

If I end up out there, a little hatchback or hybrid is not only going to be impractical for the terrain, but impractical to repair. Hybrid technology will be slow to reach the Mountain areas. Hybrids are good for stop and go driving. Montana has a posted speed limit of 80mph, because the distances are so great. I'm not anticipating the mechanics of the region will jump on the hybrid bandwagon for a long time. I'd probably have to get a small SUV with 4 wheel drive.

So, I'll either just bite the bullet and keep the Volvo all through my training. Or get a small car and then sell it after 3-5 years. I probably could keep the Volvo. I'll probably be relying on public transportation through my training. Or driving short distances. Driving in many cities is a pretty stupid thing to do, although a lot of cities lack a decent infrastructure.

Heh, I really think I'm going to end up out West though.

Staircases

My bathroom smells faintly of cigarette smoke. Which is odd, for a couple of reasons.

1)Three of the fours walls face the rest of my apartment or the staircase.
2)There aren't any ducts in my bathroom.
3)The rest of my apartment smells fine.

Maybe it's just me.

I otherwise love my apartment. It is very cosy and I like the small size. I know exactly where everything is (okay, everything but one my knee guards. That could be anywhere.) and I have just enough space to move freely. I wouldn't mind having a staircase, but I don't actually want another room.

oh boy, lymphomas.

I've already forgotten my username and password for this site. Luckily, my computer appears to have memorized it, but we'll see how long that lasts. I have a crazy number of usernames and passwords at this point. I still tend to use variations on the same two words, but my usernames have radically changed and it's becoming a bit problematic. I actually had to call techsupport at the hospital the other day because I found a username and password and couldn't figure out what they were for. Actually, I was calling them for something else (new software installation - I don't have admin priviledges in the hospital system) and I asked them while they were on the phone with me. Still - that's pretty bad.

Today was a bit of a trainwreck. I hate, hate, hate driving in Pittsburgh. And I hate driving in Pittsburgh when I don't know where I'm going. So, this afternoon was very frustrating and I actually missed my dental appointment. Joy. I didn't get to run with Riley or go to the bank either, so the day was essentually a failure.

On the up side, I've 'discovered' Chris Thile and I love him. Wish they were coming to Pittsburgh.

I feel restless.

Okay, serious update

The tough thing about blogging, at least to me, is that once you get out of the habit of writing it's hard to get back into it. I blog because I want to have a record of what periods of my life were like. So, when I stop, I'm not sure where to begin.

Anyway, we're in hematology. The previous blocks have gone well - I haven't been in danger of failing any of them. Boards are rapidly approaching. I just brought four more books from a third year - she was really nice and threw in two more for free. I think I'll have all the major subject areas covered with this purchase.

I'm finding it difficult to seriously start studying because I still have classes. The current material is, afterall, fair game for the boards. So, it's not like I'm totally wasting my time. I feel like I should be starting to review though. I think I'm going to aim for a 210-220. That appears to be the fat part of the bell curve. I hope I don't look back at that sentence in a few months and snort bitterly.

I'm very happy with my life at the moment. My apartment finally feel like home - I got my first junk mail last week. I rearranged everything last weekend and I have stores of stuff. I know that's kind of an odd gauge of home - but in the past I never had a space of my own to store extra food or tin foil or toiletries. Or had guest pillow and sheets.

More importantly, I feel like I have good friends here and that I am somewhat tied to my class. I love my people here and I feel safe. I'm not terribly connected to the class, but I sort of know what is going on. That counts for something, I suppose.

I'm starting to consider the next race. I don't think I need to start training again until February, but I maintain a basal level of fitness that never really changes. I ran nine miles today, just because.

I like hematology too, which I never really expected. Weird, huh?